Things Can Only Get Better
by Paperdoll
Summary: All she ever wanted was a chance to start again...


A/N: Um…not really much to say. No slash warnings for once! ;-) Just read and enjoy, I guess, and please review. Pg-13 for language and mature themes.

Disclaimer: blah blah all belongs to J.K., blah blah blah

Things Can Only Get Better

"Ann! Would you kindly pay attention and stop distracting the other students!"

"No!" Ann shrieked at the top of her voice. "Fuck off!"

Paying no heed to the shocked giggles of her classmates, nor the teacher's angry shouts, Ann jumped to her feet, pushed her desk over with a resounding crash and fled out of the door, slamming it behind her, She would have thought they'd be used to it by now.

She ran until she reached to woody copse at the edge of the school grounds and hid herself among the trees. Flinging herself to the grounds, she allowed her breathing to return to normal, picking absently at the frayed knee of her old jeans. She knew they wouldn't follow her. They used to, but that was before they had all given up. She wondered idly if they would expel her this time, but she didn't think so. Not yet.

Who did they think they were in there, ordering her about like that? She didn't have to listen to them. They didn't own her. No one had the right to tell her what to do, except perhaps her father. But even he didn't really have the right; it was just that there wasn't much she could do about it when he did. Not like when they did. She could deal with them.

There would be a letter home tonight though in with her report, and that meant a beating. Maybe she wouldn't go home. Not until very late anyway. Give her father a chance to cool his temper before she showed up. Rolling up the tattered sleeve of her jumper, she examined the latest set of bruises that decorated her arm. She had seen worse - these ought to heal up nicely within a week or so.

If only it wasn't the end of term today. She wouldn't have to face the idea of a whole summer holiday with no escape from that death hole she had to call home.

Peering out, she had a clear view straight into her classroom window. The desk had been replaced and the teacher was striding around the classroom again, all the pupils listening attentively. Perversely, she felt a strange pang of envy…No, it couldn't be envy. That wouldn't make any sense. They were stuck in that stuffy old classroom, while she was out here, free as a bird. How could she possibly be envious?

She pulled her sleeve down again, shivering slightly in the breeze. There was a grass-stain on her knee. Her mother wouldn't be pleased about that. Ah well, couldn't be helped now. No point in worrying.

The lunch bell shrilled out from the school building. Ann watched the other children file out of the doors and into the dining hall, ignoring the gnawing feeling of hunger in her own stomach. She had grown quite accustomed to suppressing it at home, so this was no great hardship.

Eventually, a few at a time, the children trickled out of the hall, looking happy and well fed. They skipped and laughed and played tag and football on the grassy field, paying no attention to the half-hidden, forlorn little figure who crouched in the bushes.

Ann stared at them wistfully, and it wasn't until a few minutes later that she realised there were tears tumbling down her cheeks. She squeezed her eyes shut and cursed under her breath. Crying was for babies. Big girls didn't cry. Her father had told her that many times often re-enforcing the idea with a slap. 

Anyway, she had no reason to cry. She fought down the scary new feeling that was building inside her. Was it jealousy? Why were all those children so happy, when she wasn't? What did they have that she didn't?

In some dim recess of her memory, she remembered the happy days. The days when her father had always been in a good mood, and when her mother didn't go around with a permanent expression of despair. The days before the pain and beatings had begun. She pushed the memory quickly aside, not wanting to remember it. Not wanting to know that life could be any different to how it was now. One day things would get better again. They just had to. But until then she wouldn't think about it. Somehow, thinking about what could be, made what was even worse.

She sat there until darkness came, her sanctuary of twinkling stars. In the old days, when she had still had some form of hope, she had talked to the stars, telling them her fears and hopes and dreams, asking them to save her. That night she looked up at the stars for a long time. Then she fell asleep.

The next morning Ann was woken by a soft hooting sound. She opened her eyes and sat up, shaking the dew from her hair. A huge tawny owl swooped over her head, dropping a thick envelope into her lap. It was addressed to her. She looked up again, but the owl had gone.

That day Ann found out that she had been accepted to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. And that day, she realised that this was the moment she had been waiting for most of her life. This was her chance to start afresh. She was being given a chance to escape from her so-called family. Once, she had heard someone say "Carpe Diem", seize the day. Well this was her day, and she was damned if she wasn't going to seize it.

She wanted to leave the old Ann so entirely behind, that she would even change her name. With the new name chosen, the new persona would soon follow. She decided to use her middle name, Hermione.


End file.
